I Do Not Have the Answers

read career
What I’m Reading: The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin
October 24, 2018

A common misconception people have about career coaches is that we hold the answers to help you get to the next phase of your fulfilling career, and when you sign onto a program, we dole them out for you in easily digestible morsels.

If only it were that simple.

What we really have for you are the questions…and a framework to help you find the answers.

A coach’s job is to hold curiosity on your behalf, to help you move into the next phase of your career so you can make the impact you long to make and ultimately live a more meaningful and satisfying life. We get there by asking questions. It is so tempting, especially when you feel stuck or overwhelmed, to want to hand over the reins to someone else to make the decisions for you.

But that is not how meaningful and effective change works.

Only by engaging your whole self in reflection, intention setting, goal clarification, and ultimately, massive action, do you make the changes you seek. A career coach puts guardrails on the process to help you pull yourself through the squishy process of change, providing you with needed structure to engage with the questions that must be asked. The way forward will be found only by pulling yourself through and by being willing to show up and do the work, no matter how challenging that may feel. You find your own answers through reflection, noodling, experimenting, and tweaking.

How do you noodle?

You look at your stuff. By that, I mean you reflect on the part you play in perpetuating the stuck place you in which you find yourself. What is getting in your way? Observe yourself and get enough distance to be able to see what you are currently experiencing and how you are responding as separate from your essential being. See your choices and your ability to do something different than you have been. Interrupt the pattern that has not given you the outcome you want. Do this by taking chances, experimenting, and shifting your direction. If this feels intimidating or overwhelming, consider enrolling a coach for assistance, so you don’t have to tackle this alone.

How do we career coaches help you do this?

By asking questions….and by holding space for you to find your own answers.

You may fail along the way to your destination. In fact, you definitely WILL fail along your way. Failure is a terrific lesson teacher and is how you get from point A to point B. I have learned more from the failures, mistakes, and falls I’ve taken than from all the accolades and situations I have skated through with no friction. Failures are where the good stuff lies. You are, in being perfectly imperfect, scarred, and tattered, terrifically prepared for what is next. It is just all in the perspective.

And in the questions you sit with.

It is not easy to walk the path to your fulfilling career, but it is SO worth it. Rather than continuing to beat yourself up for the things you have done wrong or how you have not been able to make your dreams come true so far, explore them. Then, take intentional and discerning action toward making them come true.

That is the way to find the answers you seek.

Photo by Carry Chalk